I sang a lot in high school and I don’t want to brag, but I was pretty good at it back then. More than one rude classmate would say “It’s not over till the fat lady sings” to me as a jibe. Even though at the time, I weighed 130 pounds and was *maybe* ten pounds overweight. I was not fat. But you know what? I hear that jibe playing over and over in my head now that I’m a truly fat adult (even though I can’t sing anymore). Fat prejudice is a real thing.
And I’m not excusing the fact that I’m fat either. I’m not asking for special privileges because I am morbidly obese. I’m just stating the facts here. I am well aware that I need to lose weight. A girl can dream right? But in the meantime, I have to keep living. As I am right now. In the moment — even if it is a very fat moment.
Raising your eyebrows at me when I order a soda at a restaurant and it is not “diet” doesn’t help. Neither does exchanging glances when you see me shopping in the small girls clothes section (I have daughters). Or telling me not to have another piece of fudge. At the end of the day, there is only one person that has to live with my fat. Me.
And trust me, I already know it.
The big question for me is not how do I look, or how do I function, as a fat person. I’m not even overly concerned about the prejudice. I’ve always been pretty good at brushing off peer pressure.
But there is one thing. I still have to get dressed every day. And I sure wish clothing designers were paying attention to the fact that fat girls make up more than 60% of the female clothing market. Because fat girls love clothes too!
Fat girls still get invited to formals and weddings by the way. And we still take our kids to the pool during the summer. We go hiking, and (gasp) YES we even exercise. Where in the world are the good exercise clothes for fat people? Aren’t we the ones who need it the most?
Clothes that were originally designed to flatter little people do not flatter big people when they are “sized up”. Seriously. This is why for most of my adult life, I’ve been slopping around in jeans and a t-shirt. Because I am not going to spend good money on clothes that look worse than naked.
I am fat. And I still go to professional events for my business, attend formal events with my military husband, date my husband, get down on the floor to play with my kids, and meet friends for coffee. I celebrate life. And as much as it is possible, I’d like to live my life looking good. So a few years ago, I stopped old tight jeans and graphic tees and started seriously looking for clothes that flatter.
So like Tim Gunn said on the PBS News Hour – “Work with it people.”
I am so in love with this video. Clothing designer people need to get this!
Clothes for fat girls need to accentuate the positive, pull eyes away from the negative, and work with everything in between. It’s not rocket science. I know this, because I’ve found a few clothing companies who do the job well.
I recently asked my daughter to do a photo shoot for me in my new Kiyonna clothes. Because I love them. And I feel great when I wear them. And when I actually find clothes that fit and look good, I want to shout if from the rooftop! I’ve finally found a place to buy cute dresses for fat women. Even formals! I was kinda shocked at how much I loved these photos of me. I NEVER love photos of myself. But I had a hard time choosing which photos NOT to use! She did a fabulous job, and the fabulous clothing helped too.
And by the way, I do love a good pair of jeans with a nice top too. I’m not dissing jeans! And just so you know, I’m not expecting to be hired as a fat model any time soon, but I did have fun getting pictures taken while I was all dolled up.
I’d love to hear from you! What is your biggest challenge as a fat person? Which of the outfits in this post do you like best?